Friday, February 23, 2007

Why I will be the worst mother-in-law ever.

Today is "Career day" at the Elementary school. I asked if this meant that people of various professions would come in and give speeches regarding their jobs. Of course that isn't what it means. It means the children get to dress up as what they want to be when they grow up. Exciting! Particularly rude, however, was the note sent home that indicated: No Spiderman costumes. I really WANT to be Spiderman when I grow up.

Anyway. I asked the kids what they want to be when they grow up. The answer varies by the day of the week. Generally, Girl Child says she wants to be a writer. She stuck with that this time and wore her normal jeans and long sleeve t-shirt. She carried a notepad, a pen, and two books. Knowing Girl Child, she will tell everyone what she wants to be so there will be no question.

Boy Child thought seriously about his future career, and nixed Video Game design because I told him that they probably dressed like mommy for work: whatever you want to wear as long as long as nothing that identifies your gender is hanging out. He also nixed President of the United States because I told him we couldn't go rent a tuxedo.

Finally he decided he would be a "good policeman". He picked out a long sleeve button down shirt (in blue) from his closet, a pair of jeans, and informed me that he would make himself a badge and carry his pretend handcups. (Handcuffs...I just can't bring myself to correct him. I'm a good mother like that.)

He meticulously cut out a perfect star. The kid is an absolutely amazing artist and his attention to detail is almost shocking. It has to be absolutely perfect or it's not worth doing.

He colored the star yellow and wrote on it:

Hisfirstname

a

Police

I told him to just erase the "a". People would figure it out.

This morning I pinned it on his shirt and he clipped the handcuffs to his belt loop. Once his outfit was complete he grinned at me and said, "How do I look?"

"You're hot," I said.

"Mom!" he exclaimed. "I'm not the fashion police!"





I will be a bad mother-in-law because I cannot imagine that on the face of this planet, there is a girl who is good enough for him.





I'm just kidding. Kind of.

20 comments:

Wendy said...

So funny! My hubby and I always have the inlaw conversation and Wesley is only 6! I do like to be prepared ahead of time:)

dennis said...

my imps dating?

heaven forbid I have to consider this topic anytime soon!!

M said...

Well I'm prepared to pimp out Lily. Provided, of course, he wants to wait around until he's 40 or so when I decide she can wed and he doesn't mind younger womenfolk. :)

You're going to be one hell of a MIL. Seriously...remember what a good mother you are? Learning from shit teaches you greatness sometimes! You definitely learned from the best of the worst MIL wise. :)

frannie said...

I know how you feel... I don't think anyone will ever measure up to my standards for my baby.

I would love to see pics!

Rachel said...

There's never any one that's good enough! Hmmm, makes me wonder what my MIL thinks!

Amy W said...

I just KNOW I am going to be the bossy mother in law!

Seriously, you son can marry my oldest any day. Although there would be some of an age difference....

nailgirl24 said...

HHAHAH i feel the same way about my boys. God help their future wives.

dawnnnn said...

Twins is good.

:o)

Brown Eyed Girl said...

We've had this conversation plenty o time...

A) Twin Boy Child is da shiznit
B) We are both going to be co-MIL of The Year Someday or better yet..since Kyle is older I will win it like 5 years in a row..then finally FINALLY you will win and I will pass the crown to you and we'll both be crying in the bowling alley because that CLEARLY is the place for our pretend "Best Mother In Law Pageant" no?

and

C) Your children ROCK because YOU rock!

Angie said...

I have always sincerely prayed for whomever my future son-in-law's are that I will have a generous heart and be able to love them, really love them. While this is a funny subject it really strikes a cord in me. Not only do I have children the same age as yours and younger but I have a daughter who will be 20 in a couple of months. The reality of it all is in my face and I have trouble laughing at it. It is also possible that within the next 10 years I could well be a grandmother! Holy smokes!

Your boy is a riot. "Fashion Police" was a most excellent come back.

my4kids said...

Same with me and my boys, God help their future wives. If I let them get married anyway, hehe....
There is no female good enough for them........hahaha

Em said...

What a great story! I bet he made a fabulous 'police' on career day!

Alpha Dude 1.5 said...

Fashion Police! You all crack me up! What a fun family!

Several years ago, my daughter wore a dress/suit and wearing the name badge I made for her, she went to school career day as "The First Woman President of the United States". She was the most adorable 8 year old there.

You know something? At the rate she's going, she just might make it.

Did you notice? Your daughter went dressed as.....her mom.
That's cool.

Gerbil said...

THE FASHION POLICE!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Shanilie said...

I think about it all the time and Jacob isn't even 2 yet! I see so many people not having a good relationship with inlaws and every time there is any stress with mine I say out loud....I hope he marries someone who likes me.....yes, and who will be good enough for him....but I hope we can all have a good relationship.

Real Life in South Carolina said...

Handcups! I love it! My 5 year old saw a "copy car" last night but the "copies" were just sitting in there, he didn't see any "copies shooting anyone." I love having kids around.

Kellie said...

Loving it...the fashion police, the "handcups"....

I think I will be a the MIL in from hell. I doubt anyone will be good enough for my daughter (unless it's the son of the fantastic blogging chicks I read/who read me).

Ellie said...

Great thoughts Chick. Coming from a mother who has been there and done that, I do hope for a good marriage for both my kids, but I have purposed in my heart not to be a meddling mil. I have one of those and it is the pits. Once they leave our home, I want my kids to be free to have a wonderful life with each other without my input with every move they make. I am speaking from having lived under a dictator type mil for too many years. As your children grow older you will understand where I am coming from.

SJ said...

You have one hilarious family! What a witty thing for him to come back with!

Stephanette said...

Hey, that chick~

I think you'll be the best MIL a girl could ask for. My Hubby is in Law Enforcement. Do you want me to look for one of their metal "kid's badges" to send for boy child? I'd be happy to.

Let me know.