Thursday, March 15, 2007

He's no Ben Stein.

Dude.

Seriously. If you have to give a speech in front of like, an entire branch of the government? You might want to consider looking at your notes BEFORE you get there.

Because, really, speaker who's name I cannot be bothered to remember, it was so not cool when your slide would flash up on the screen and you'd say crap like,

"Yeah...um...okay...here is a...well, um...it looks like this is a map of Europe."

Because, dude. We KNOW it's a map of Europe. Even if some of us were lacking in our mad Geographical skillz? It said, "EUROPE" really big across it. And that's just not a trick you would want to play on the government.

You also might want to rethink the monotone voice you used. It was really distracting, especially for the guy who was snoring yesterday? Today he sat behind me. I thought he might actually, physically fall on me, and then I would just have to sue you for negligence. And no one wants that.

Please. Rethink your job as a public speaker. Stick with whatever it is you do on a regular basis.

14 comments:

Gerbil said...

"Bueller? Bueller?"



Also? The word verification for today? Sounds like the noise my husband makes when he snores. "mmsnqwdy"

my4kids said...

That is bad. But isnt that a government thing to have boring speakers that way no one listens. So are you done with the conference thing or still got tomorrow to go. We are enjoying your experience this week. Honestly its more interesting then my week

Unknown said...

I just wanted you to know that when I clicked to read your comments (cuz you really have some funny friends), the word verification was zzzhpb and I thought it seemed appropriate.

Portrait of Peter said...

It's the same here in Scotland - all Government officials must have the same criteria - to serve no purpose to society!!!

Then they ask why our blood pressure, alcohol and smoking increases!! - due in part to the Government officials - whose status - is questionable.

How to return home -sane - dream!!

Enjoyed your postings from a conference.

Anonymous said...

You should totally go to conferences more often! This stuff is priceless!

Just bring the kiddos with you next time, and you'll make millions I tell you!

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

~snigger~

Tonya said...

lmao.. that sounds super exciting.. talk about boring!

Rachel (Crazy-Is) said...

Too funny! Boy am I jealous that I didn't get to go to that conference! Totally jealous!

Alpha Dude said...

I'm happy to hear you are enjoy your conference.

*****chortle****

Alpha Dude said...

enjoying. I menat to say enjoyING.

You figured that out though, huh?

Elle*Bee said...

There are times when hours seems like minutes...and then, thanks to boring speakers, there are times when hours seems like eons! Sorry you had to sit through that one.

Elle*Bee said...

oops! Apologizing for my poor grammar, that should read "hours seem like minutes". Yikes.

Jocelyn said...

And you know he thinks "Europe," like "Africa," is a country.

alissa said...

Your conference notes are making me recall all the reasons I NEVER wanted to work again!

One in particular - two days on mining. Yes, MINING. I'm falling asleep just thinking about it. I was that guy who sat behind you.