Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Boy Child=Concerned.

Boy Child: Mom? I have a serious question for you.

Me: Okay, honey. What it is?

Boy Child: Can you look at the inside of my lip here?

Me: Sure.

*pulls lip down*

Boy Child: What is it mom? Is it herpes?

Me: Um, what?

Boy Child: I saw on the television that you can get a herpes on your mouth.

Me: Well, that's true. But-

Boy Child: Am I going to have to take Valtrex mom? And warn my partner?

Me: Um, what?

Boy Child: I saw a commercial about Valtrex? And the girl said she had herpes and the boy said he didn't? And I don't know what a partner is mom. Is that like my sparing partner? Because I don't want to tell Isaac that I have herpes.

Me: *blink*

Boy Child: So can we go to Walgreens mom?

Me: Um. Boy Child. Valtrex is for genital herpes.

Boy Child, raising eyebrows: Oh. Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Genitals! Down there!

(He points at his crotch, in case I am uncertain of the meaning of the word genitals)

Me: Right. And you have a little sore on your mouth. Probably where you bit your lip when you were eating.

Boy Child: Oh.

Me: So, get some toothpaste and put on it and you'll be fine.

Boy Child: Okay. Thanks mom.

Me: You are welcome.

Boy Child, running down to the hall, to Girl Child: Guess what Girl Child! I don't have herpes!



For. The. Love. Of. God.

39 comments:

Tara said...

bwahahahaha

commercials. gotta love em.

AndreAnna said...

I can't wait for these conversations!

Girl from Pennsylvania said...

I love the childens...

Sometime I should tell the story about my 7 year old brother and havng to explain thongs.

Morgan said...

I hate those commercials. But, your boy child is so funny.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

OMFG. My mom and I nearly wet ourselves laughing so damned hard!

Allie Bear said...

ROTFLMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amy Bennett said...

THAT is hilarious

amanda said...

Bwahahaha. Absolute classic.

Midlife Mama said...

OMG. That is tooo funny. Let's just hope he doesn't blab to the pastor at your church that he doesn't have herpes. Oh good gravy!!!

Pretty soon you'd have children's services knocking down your door. YIKES!

Jake said...

Hey That Chick,

That has got to be the funniest thing I've read all week!!! I wanted to know if you got my email. It's from toadfblog@gmail.com. Thanks!

Stephanie said...

HAHAHAHAHA! My kids listen to every freaking commercial too. They give me advice on what items I should purchase and who the best insurance company is.

Anglophile Football Fanatic said...

Holy crap that's a good Boy Child moment.

Daphne said...

Roflmao!

It's so funny what they pick up from the tv!
my 6 year old goes around singing that song from the Free Credit Report.com commercial ...lol

Amanda Daybyday said...

Ha ha ha! Way too cute.

ばらっち said...

Hello.This is first time for me to visit your site.
funny conversation!
I have three children (6year-old boy,4year-old boy,2year-old girl)
Their talk often make me confused.

I'm happy if you link to my site.It is written in Japanese(some of the words are English) but show pictures.
baratch family

Angie said...

Your kids are freakin hilarious. I can't wait to meet you all in person (cough, cough).

Mikey said...

ROTFL!!! OMG. The things they get from TV!
Mine last night (she's 4) says "Let's kiss like women"
I said ok to see what this is about. She smooches me on the lips for as long as I'll let her (about 3 seconds) mashing my lips. Then we had to have the talk about not kissing on the lips. I'd hate to see that happen during a playdate! Daddy said no kissing like that for 20 yrs.... lol
I swear, what the heck was she watching on TV????

Kimberly said...

I'm suddenly considering cancelling the cable...

Emma in Canada said...

Toothpaste on a sore really?

I once had herpes on my chest. So not fun. And who knew it was called herpes!

Mean Stepmom said...

Thanks for the laugh :)

Betsey Booms said...

And who says our children don't learn from watching TV.

That's quite an education he gave himself there.

Karin's Korner said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....I love your children

KrustyLynn said...

Your kids are too smart for their own good! I love them!

Julie said...

Man boy child is funny. What a relief he must have felt not to have to tell his sparing partner he had herpes - hahaha. So cute!

And what does toothpaste do - shrink the bump? Cause I bit my lip the other day and keep biting it.

Catwoman said...

At least he talked to you first, before telling his sparring partner he has herpes!

And I think it's sweet that he was concerned!

Mike Marshall said...

I think that some of the shit they feed us on TV has subliminal messages. I'm not paranoid but have found myself lately thinking that perhaps I sould talk to my doctor about whether Flomax is for me...........Bwahahahahhahahahahaha! Peace, Mike.

Birth Sister Doula Services said...

My 8 yr old is obsessed with open-mouth kissing now. I'd much rather have the "why Valtrex isn't for you" talk than the "don't kiss mommy with your mouth open" talk.

Good times. Good times.

Sarcasta-Mom said...

Oh my freeling word. Toooo good.

We've had a few chats about commercials in our house two. Stupid advertising....

giants fan said...

at least he didn't ask for vagisil!!

kristi said...

TV is the devil! LOL!

Jonny's Mommy said...

Your kids crack me right up!

Holy crap that is so funny.

EE said...

OMG... I am totally laughing my butt off!!
We see those Valtrex commercials all the time, too!
"sparring partner"....thought I was going to lose it when he said that!!!
I think this is one of my all-time favorite posts EVAH!!!!

Bekah said...

oh. my. gosh.

kittyconcerto.com said...

you have GOT to be kidding me! What a riot. I had to read this to my husband because it was toooooo funny.

Jennifer said...

OMG that's priceless! Those awful drug commercials are just seeping in to all our brains!

Amira said...

Omigosh. SO freaking funny!

So, this is what I have to look forward to in a few years...

Love your kid stories.

Megan said...

My kids know and sing the Valtrex commercial all of the time "It's a beautiful morning...ah ah ah ah". YOu know? I am thinking, "That is to a Herpes commercial!!!!" YUCK!!!!!!! They have no idea what it is all about! :0

Rachel said...

You could bring back Kids Say The Darndest Things with just your two kids!!

Except, it would have to be on like HBO and whatnot.

Valtrex Side Effects said...

My name is Laura Clos and i would like to show you my personal experience with Valtrex.

I am 29 years old. Have been on Valtrex for 12 months now. Just wanted to get the word out there that there are some kind of weird and scary side effects that might make it not worth taking the drug.

I have experienced some of these side effects -
I have had a few really vivid nightmares once in a while since I started taking this medication. The reason I'm posting this is that I had one last night & I can't even explain how real it felt. I forced myself with all of my strength to wake up & once I did I felt completely disoriented, lightheaded, and confused. I was terrified to go back to sleep. Some hair loss as well. Some depression and mental fogginess. And some increase in IBS symptoms. Really though the occasional extremely intense nightmare is the worst side effect.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Laura Clos