Wednesday, December 17, 2008


Today at school? Boy and Girl Child have a lesson on "Your Changing Bodies".

For real. It's called that. I had to sign a permission slip.

Since we have absolutely no boundaries in our lives or home, we've already discussed this at length. This is pretty much how it went:

Boy Child: Mom? What's this program about my body?

Me: You know. It's about puberty.

Boy Child: Oh. Like getting hair on my cubes?

Me: Right.

Boy Child: And under my arms?

Me: Yes.

Boy Child: And on my legs?

Girl Child: Brother! You already HAVE hair on your legs!

Boy Child: Not like daddy!

Me: True dat.

Boy Child: Mom? Can I ask you a question?

Me: Sure.

Boy Child: Does puberty hurt?

Me: Not really. It doesn't hurt to grow hair. It might hurt a little if your body grows very quickly. And you might be more emotional.

Boy Child: You mean like crying?

Me: Maybe.

Boy Child: I only cry at sad things. Hair isn't sad mom.

Me: Some people have sad hair. But in general, you are right.

Girl Child: Three girls in my class have got their period mom.

Me: Well that's okay. Some girls get it when they are younger and some get it when they are older.

Boy Child: How old were you when you got it mom?

Me: Well, I was a little older. I don't remember exactly.

Boy Child: Mom! MOM! My friend at school? FriendChild? He said he was going to sit next to me during the presentation because he was scared.

Me, laughing: Friendchild is really funny.

Boy Child: I don't know why he's scared mom. He's already really tall. He probably has hair on his cubes already.

Me: Don't ask him.

Boy Child: Gross mom!

We drive for a few moments and Boy Child says:
Mom? Why would my friend really be afraid?

Me: I think he was kidding.

Boy Child: He doesn't know anything about it mom. I think he's really afraid. Like actually. Not just pretending.

Me: Well, that's why they have the presentation. So you'll understand.

Boy Child: Why didn't his mom just tell him?

Me: I don't know honey. I don't know his mom.

Boy Child, after a few minutes:
Thanks for telling us about it mom.

Me: You're welcome honey.

Girl Child, snorting: Hair on your cubes isn't scary anyway.

True dat, Girl Child. True dat.


Allie said...

LOL, that was funny.

You're such a good mom, your kids are lucky to have someone that they can talk to so openly. I hope I have the same kind of relationship you do with your kids when mine are 10.

Anonymous said...

Good job. It def clears a lot of stuff up by talking to your kids in a comfortable environment!

Lisa said...

I was completely horrified at the thought of 10 year old girls having their periods, then I remembered you are in the south...and many of your daughter's classmates may be 12 and still in the 5th grade. (Before the outrage begins regarding the "south" comment...I hail from the great state of Kentucky--teeth optional--ha)

ps even though religion never really took with me...i'll try the praying for you are on my happy thoughts list, as always.

Creamy Silver said...

I distinctly remember asking my mother about Cubic Hair when I was a kid too.

Angie said...

Good Lord in Heaven. . .your kids make my day!!!

You do too, by the way!!

Malskey said...

I love it! I had that kind of relationship with my Mom and It helped so much!! You are awesome!! Seriously! This post made my day!!

Anonymous said...


Oh, that is just perfect.

misocancook said...

Your kids rock. So do you.

Meredith / birthsister said...

hairy cubes only hurt when the short'n'curlies get caught in the zipper. or so i've been told.

Mine had "the chat" at school last year (5th grade). I was more worried that he'd decide to tell everyone everything he knew about how babies come out and scare his classmates into abstinence. there's a thought... :)

giants fan said...

not having cubes myself, it would be hard for me to know whether hairy ones hurt or not... but I believe girlchild is correct.

Anonymous said...

Gosh your kids are hilarious. Thanks for teaching me the term "cubes." Now I feel edumacated.

Anonymous said...




elle said...

Here's hoping that they actually teach the kids something worthwhile. Because here in ID it goes sort of like this: Sex is bad and you shouldn't do it until you're married. And then a whole bunch of, Hmmm, how'd all the girls get pregnant?

Teena in Toronto said...

You handled that so well1

Emma in Canada said...

Your conversations are so amusing! Taylor and Liam pretty much knew it all when they went through that presentation (I am pretty sure the same film is shown to all of North America) so nothing was a shock to them. They've known about the joy of periods since they were old enough to walk in on me in the bathroom.

Julie said...

On your cubes - that's funny!

SJ said...

You are such a good Mom! Your kids are lucky to have you :)

This post made my day (cubes. *chuckle*)

Lil Mouse said...

hopefully we can teach our kids to be as real about things. i was never told a thing, i think i was supposed to find out like 5th hand or something. my wedding night didnt hold any surprises, but not knowing a lot of stuff didnt make it any easier.

Jenski said...

Your kids are great (as if you needed confirmation?!). They're lucky to have a caring open mom - why leave all that real life education to when the curriculum thinks it is right. They've obviously already missed some of the kids who are going through it!