Okay, I'm lying. It's my first post. But the first post is always really boring and annoying, right? It's a post that says something like:
Hi! Welcome to my blog! I have no freaking idea what I'm going to say now! Hehe!
Really, I'm not much of a "hehe" kind of chick. I can't even get it together enough to care right now. I have stuff I want to say and I'm not going to be bothered to introduce myself right now. Now, on to the interesting stuff.
Being a mother of a little boy is really a unique experience. I just put his laundry into the dryer and in the bottom of the washing machine I found:
1) An unopened package of Whoppers (the candy, you know, chocolate malted milk balls?)
2) Two empty Skittles packages
3) A plastic cockroach
4) A plastic dinosaur
5) A plastic glow in the dark bat
Sigh.
So, I called him in.
"Son," I said. "I need to talk to you about your laundry."
"What," says he. "Did I get skidmarks in my boxer shorts again?"
Sweet. God. He's such a man already and only eight years old.
No worse than my daughter, however, who earlier today in the shower gleefully announced, "MOM! I'M DONE! I WASHED MY HAIR AND MY FACE AND MY PENIS!"
Sigh.
"SWEETHEART!" I shouted back. "YOU DON'T HAVE A PENIS!"
"OH I FORGOT! I MEANT MY BAGINA!"
To which my husband replied, "GOD! STOP TALKING ABOUT SEX ORGANS!"
Our neighbors? I imagine they hate us a lot.
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2 comments:
I imagine your neighbors love you. A lot. Cod knows I do!
But you knew that.
Shhh. I found where you're hiding. That's what happens when you are all signed in when commenting on the child of great modesty!!!
oh.
my.
God.
Peeing my pants right now. Getting funny looks from the couch dweller and company. haha. Your kids rock.
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