Thursday, April 26, 2007

Goodbye, Ruby Tuesday...*

Every day of my life, I write down a list of tasks that need to be completed.

Most days, almost nothing gets done off that list of tasks, primarily, I’ve noticed, because there are always new tasks that get added to that list that seem to take priority.

One of the tasks on my list, for example, is: Jacket

I bought my husband this jacket for Christmas. He had a barn jacket for years and years and it was accidentally thrown out by one of my nephews (which just really hammered home my point to him which is: PLASTIC GARBAGE BAGS ARE NOT LUGGAGE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD) and he has whined about his inability to find one since that time.

Well, I found one at L.L. Bean, which was perfect. It was perfect! I purchased it for Christmas and displayed it under the tree in the cool L.L. Bean box with the red bow.

Except when he put it on and determined it didn’t “hang right”.

He is such a complete and total girl.

Anyway, I’ve been meaning to send the jacket back since…well, the day after Christmas. At this point, I don’t know that they will take it back, honestly, even though it hasn’t been worn. Not that I blame them.

But I have to find SOMETHING to do with that jacket. Preferably something not in my own personal home so I won't have to hear my husband say every single day of my life, "When are you going to send that jacket back?"

It is just not a priority to me. I look at it every day and I move it to the next day every day and I just cannot bring myself to make any kind of effort towards finding out what I should actually DO with that stupid jacket.

Another entry on my list: File.

I hate to file. Oh my sweet Baby Jesus in a manager with cattle lowing. I HATE TO FILE.

Looking at my home this would be surprising, I suppose, because in my living room next to the ginormous, ugly desk that my husband loves and adores, is a file cabinet. Inside that file cabinet are neatly labeled folders: 2001 Taxes, Car Insurance, Home Insurance, Boy Child, Girl Child, Sallie Mae.

Jason and I each have a file. Mine contains my birth certificate and social security card. Jason’s contains every single piece of paper he’s every laid his hands on, ever, because he’s the world’s biggest packrat and is loathe to throw out anything. Ever.

At work my to-be-filed pile is the size of my considerable derriere and growing. Every day I look at it, somewhat dejectedly, and wish it would go to hell and die. It never does. Every now and then I’ll make a half-hearted attempt at filing. Like yesterday, for example, I put away exactly three pieces paper. The remaining eight-thousand? I just couldn’t muster it up within myself. Every now and then (read: almost never) I get on a big kick and just file the crap out of everything. That has not happened lately.

So many other things on my to-do list are just never going to get done. Clear off desk? Yeah. Likely! Clean out binder. Um, BAHAHAHAHAAHA! That would require me dealing with the massive amount of random paperwork I currently have stuffed in my binder and that’s just not going to happen. Required Reading? Lord. Have. Mercy. I’ve been working on this one, and no, I’m not kidding, since April of LAST YEAR. Still not done! I’m awesome!

Sometimes I put things that are required by law for me to do on my to-do list, just so I can feel good.

Put seatbelts on children. CHECK!
Feed children. CHECK!
Sign timesheet so your sorry butt gets paid. CHECK-A-RONI!
Mess around on the internet with my blog way to much. CHECK-A-LECK-A-DING-DONG!

I just didn’t turn out. I’m sad to say. I just did not turn out.

*This does not refer to the restaurant, Ruby Tuesday, but in fact to the fantastical Rolling Stones song. The lyrics, in part, read:
There's no time to lose,
I heard her say,
Catch your dreams,
before they slip away
Dying all the time
Lose your dreams
And you will lose your mind.
Aint life unkind?
Goodbye, ruby tuesday
Who could hang a name on you?
When you change with every new day
Still Im gonna miss you...

Which, I know. Way profound for a Thursday morning. But still. Good song. Good times.


Anonymous said...

I have a daily list, too...some stuff gets done, most gets added to the next day's list. It's fun.

Filing SUCKS. I had a crapton of paperwork to be filed at my last job and I'd always let it pile up and up and up and then have to suck it up and spend 4 hours filing. God, it makes me itch and foam at the mouth to remember that.


Happy Working Mom said...

Yeah, I kept reading through the post trying to figure out what it had to do with Ruby Tuesday the restaurant...thanks for clarifying!

I hate filing as well, which is why our office is full of papers right now...all over the place. We did just buy a really fast scanner so now we're going to scan everything and THROW IT AWAY!

frannie said...

i just have to say, once again, we are the same person. seriously. the. same. person.

I put love my son and love my husband on my list so I can check them off- 'cause I ain't checkin' anything else.

CPA Mom said...

Filing - I hate with a passion. I didn't file for a full year at my last job and I left it there for the next person....BWHAHAHAHAHA! Bet he loved me.

Then again, maybe not.

My filing at home = the pile is so high, if it fell off it might injure small children and small dogs. Since I have some of those, I might want to get cracking. You think? (instead of trolling the internet looking for Josh Groban pre-sale codes but I found it and OMG I'm going to see Josh Groban, row k, section 101, OMG)

Alpha Dude 1.5 said...

I am so gald you cannot see my desk.

We had a series of "thefts" at work last year. My office was left alone. All I can guess is that they took one look in here and thought "What a mess! There can't be anything of value in there!"

Sometimes "not filing" can be a good thing.


nailgirl24 said...

Now I have that song stuck in my head, and I loathe that song!! Thanx Chick!!

Emily said...

I think we all have some task that for some reason we just can't make ourselves do. And then we I do take care of it, I'm like "that was freakin easy...why didn't I do that months ago!?"

Kimberly said...

To Do List's are of the Devil!

I keep a "Done List" instead. Much more affirming. =)

Rachel said...

My to-do list is also never ending. Filing? How I hate thee!

My filing stack at work is, I kid you not, at least 2 feet high and growing by inches every damn day!

Emma in Canada said...

In my neverending, as yet unachieved, quest to become organized I have started prefiling. Everything is supposed to go into a 7 pocket file folder, where it hopes to eventuallymake it to its proper home.

Yeah, it was stupid. All I did was add an extra step.

That's just the way I work.

Heathie said...

I'll do your filing if you'll put away my clean dishes. For some reason, I *hate* puting away clean dishes, so the dishwasher stays full and the dirty dishes just stack up. Drives the hubby crazy.
I like Kimberly's idea of a done list. I think I'll go write one. There will only be one thing on it today.

Angie said...

I thought you were referring to the plethorah of Ruby Tuesday restaurants in our area.

Oh well. . .Happy Thursday!

Shanilie said...

Lists, oh what would I do without my lists! Ryan makes fun of me because my lists are color coded, underlined etc. Even when the babysitter comes over I have a novel written for them.

Love your previous post. I feel the same way with # 1 + 2 "loves" and "hates" #1, 2 and almost always #3...I can't stand braws. I need boob lypo suction.

Puppie said...

L.L. Bean will take it back. They will. They've got a satisfaction-guaranteed policy, which is what makes them so awesome. Just bring the jacket and the receipt into work and send it out from there sometime. Reclaim your money!

EE said...

I have to recopy the list after I've checked something off. I know, it's a pathetic waste of time and paper, but I'm oddd like that.

Bethany said...

I adore you! I knew it was the song and sang it while reading. I love that song.

Bethany said...

Oh yeah...
filing sucks. That's why I have it on my List of 2007. Here we are coming into the fifth month of 2007, have a filed anything?


Anonymous said...

For Christmas Eve last year my side of the family decided to have a Christmas grab bag and we each bring a $10.00 wrapped gift. If you were a boy you brought a boy gift and same for a girl. Well, of course, Ellie gets to buy the boy gift for Neil because Neil says he doesn't know what to get. So, I found the "perfect gift" at the store, Tuesday Mornings and it was "perfect". It was this tape measure that you can talk into. You measure something and then you record the measurement in the recorder and you never lose your measurements. Well, when I brought it home Neil informed me that THAT was NOT a good gift and he wouldn't want one like that so why would anyone else like one? I thought it was a great idea, but obviously it wasn't. We bought something else and I was to return the undesireable gift at my convenience. It has never been convenient and I am still dragging that thing with me everywhere I go. It rides on the back seat of my car along with the receipt. The receipt does say it is nonreturnable after 30 days, I think I am over the time limit....Good Will here we come!

I could have simply said....I can relate, but my motor mouth had to say all that instead...

Amira said...

Ha ha! Chick, you make me laugh. Thank you. I need it. Every day.

It's a JOY to read your blog.

velocibadgergirl said...

I love you more than bread, and that's a lot. xoxo

Jocelyn said...

Could you somehow tie your children's allowances into their doing the filing for you?

SJ said...

I hate filing, and I hate how my To-Do list gets bigger and bigger each day ......

Ugh, sometimes being a grown-up just sucks.