Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Just get here if you can. Or not.

I love my sitemeter and the unique view of the world that it affords me.

Following are some of the more interesting searches that have led others to my blog recently. Enjoy!

“my son complains of an itchy butt”
“itchy butt, can’t sleep”

Have I written about itchy butts? I really don’t recall. I say so much crap I can’t be expected to remember all of it. Maybe I said my son said it sucks when you have an itchy butt? Because he says that all the time in real life.


barry gibb’s overweight daughter”

I’m not her!


“nose bidet, Walgreens

Um. What?


“Jason, kill anyone who says curse words”

Seek. Professional. Help. For the Love of God and Baby Jesus.


“I am fat and my husband no longer loves me”

I’m so sorry.
Divorce his stupid butt and go out with somebody else.


“bathroom sayings for sanitary napkins”

Um. What?


“i gave myself a nose job with crazy glue”

I totally want to meet you. I think we might be soul mates.


“Displayed on Butts 2 love”

Um. Okay, yeah. Whatever turns you on.


“What to do if your flip flops make a squeaky noise”

Duh! You DANCE!

24 comments:

Amy W said...

Omigod, those are hilarious!!

Totally going to go check out mine now...

Catwoman said...

Oh how I love sitemeter... The number of people who've discovered my site looking for "strange-colored poop" and Eskimo porn, well, it makes me so happy. And kind of confused.

Heather said...

I just got site meter last week. Love it! I had no idea I had this many people actually coming to my blog.

Your searches are great! So far the only search I have had on mine is for excema...

Kellie said...

Too funny....makes me want to go check mine :)

nailgirl said...

Yeah i get some real winners on my site too.

Kimberly said...

My favourite one that's lead someone to my site is, "How to rule the world with jello."

I need to turn that into a post somehow.

I have a sudden urge to dance though. =P

Rachel said...

Bwaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Freakin hilarious!

Emma in Canada said...

I really love sitemeter seaches. They sort of make my internet day. Seond to comments of course.

frannie said...

people find you through a lot of "butt" searches! they would!

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

Aren't these fantastic....?

and rudeness said...

Sitemeter is a blog girls best friend.

I have a file on my desktop called "The Weird Shit"... and I put all the google searches I get in it.

"...undressed, put on gown, sat on table..."

Right... whats going on here?!

After this post I bet your "butt" searches will DOUBLE. Maybe even TRIPLE.

Kelly M said...

ROTFLMAO...way too funny!! I often read those myself and always get a chuckle!

Britmum said...

Had to have a giggle. It was a must!

Take care xx

M said...

I really want to know how you get great searches and 99% of mine now are about freaking barlothin cysts. SO not as amusing.

Angie said...

I don't think my sitemeter is as good as yours. I can't tell if people search me out or not.

But, that's allright. I get cool comments from you - and some other relaly cool people. That's all I need.

That. . . and clear pee!

(I'm probably doing about 1.5 gallons)

SJ said...

Oh man, I think I might check mine now....

These were hilarious!

EE said...

LOL! Mine are never that interesting:(

Amira said...

OMG. Yes, we should all have a contest: Most interesting Google searches leading others to our site. Mine seem to be mostly porn. Yeah. Shocker.

my4kids said...

Those are hilarious. I get some strange ones on mine also sometimes....

I think you get all the butt ones from the post you did awhile ago when you had a fall and said you had a dent in your butt! I still have to laugh about that comment, sorry. I can relate though right now after falling of the horse my right cheeck is very bruised! I didn't say it though since I figured it would bring me a lot of weird butt searches also!

Happy Working Mom said...

Those are freaking hilarious! I wish I knew how to see what people typed in to find me....

Jodi said...

How Crazy Funny! I Think however we all find you, we're lucky we did. Thanks for the laughs..

mAsOn & tErrI's mOm said...

LMAO!!! itchy butt? uhhh. . .wet wipes? and effort cure that!~!

Joy T. said...

Itchy butt and squeaky flip flops. And I thought "I" was having a bad day.

Stephanie said...

I'm not exactly sure how I found your site, but it's definitely my lucky day. This post made me laugh (almost as much as the scary dude sleeping in front of your driveway) so hard I'm crying. Tears are streaming down my face and my cat is looking at me like I've lost my mind. Your writing is hilarious! Thanks for the great laugh today, I so appreciate it.