Killing me softly.

Last night? Ginger crapped on the rug.

She just doesn't do that. So it was weird. And it smelled like, well, crap. Which I guess makes sense but still doesn't make it any better.

I couldn't sleep. Jason was snoring really loudly and the dog was wimpering until about 5am when she decided she would just bark loudly. I went and let her out of her crate and she immediately drank every bit of water in her bowl.

At about 6:30am while I was dressing? She peed on the floor.Boy Child decided he would help and went to clean it up.

With Kaboom or Bam or one of those cleaners that Billy Mayes shrieks about on the television while I'm trying to sleep.

On my carpet.
My light beige carpet.

So I'm on my hands and knees with a bucket of water and it's not even 7am. Not even.

No school today because of the elections, so I take the kids to Taekwondo. No one is there.

We drive to the bank so I can deposit two checks. I have the checks, my check card and the envelope in my hand. I go to write out the deposit slip and my checkcard is gone. I drove around got out of the car, dug through the seats, under the seats, in my clevage, everywhere. I can't find it.

I start crying and debate going home.

But I can't, because I have to give training at 10am.

I go back to Taekwondo. It's open.

An hour later, I get to work, open my email and the first one is from my new boss and it, in my opinion, is accusatory.

I go to the bathroom. Cry again.

I get an email informing me that someone else decided they wanted to use the conference room, which I intended to use for my training. Even though I booked it last month, I am booted.

I have to scurry around making other arrangements.

Twenty people come. One of whom marks up the test, tells me how every single thing I did was wrong (I passed out the tests incorrectly even) and then seriously asks me what I've been doing for the last year that I haven't fixed this yet.

Clearly, I've been sitting on my ass eating bon-bons. I mean, clearly.

I went outside, called my friend and cried on the phone.

Called my former boss and cried on the phone.

Went to therapy and cried for like, an hour.

Usually therapy makes me feel better, but today? Not so much.


So. Know anyone who is hiring? Because I need a new job before I tell everyone to kiss my fat bon-bon eating ass, I'm going home.