In my world, we have to stick to schedules. We "live or die" by schedules. Everyone cares more about schedules than anything. Like, for example, if you were working so much that you keeled over and died at your desk? Well, screw you. We've got a schedule to keep.
I've been keeping my schedule on track. It is important to me that I do so.
Earlier this week, a new unwiped anus was hired and he's been annoying the crap out of me. Because of his constant interuptions, I had fear that I would not be able to complete the schedule items which were due today.
Today, he came in and began his load of crap. "Do you have a minute?"
Well, a minute in his time is like a minute during professional football. It's actually like, six and a half hours and then John Madden starts talking and you just want to shoot yourself in the ears before it's all over with.
So I said, firmly, "I have ONE minute. I'm busy working on this. Which is due TODAY. So I can stay on SCHEDULE."
He then sat down and began to QUIZ ME ON WHAT I WOULD SAY TO AN AUDITOR.
After five minutes of his rambling, I said, "I wouldn't say anything to an auditor. I'm not the manager and I don't get paid to deal with that. And, not to be rude, but didn't I mention to you already that I have to do this TODAY? And I'm right in the middle of this and I'm not going to get it done if you don't stop quizzing me."
And holy crap you guys. He stopped talking! He stopped quizzing me! It totally worked.
I hit the send button at 3:20pm, safely delivering my scheduled items to the appropriate individuals.
I'm cool like that.