Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Random list-o-crap

-What is UP with people offering me work lately? I seriously have had like three offers this week! Which, in case it needs to be said? TOTALLY ROCKS. I must have good karma or something. Yay!

-Sadly? This asston of work? Is really cutting into my sleeping/laundry/exercise/sitting on my hiney/cooking/being a responsible citizen time.

-Do you see this dog? I freaking love her even though her farts smell like something crawled up her butt, died, the corpse was dragged out by the ghost of whatever died and then the ghost vomited on it.

Because she's so cute, people don't believe she's nasty. But Ms. Jackson? She's nasty.

-Why does Twitter suck so much? I mean, I love it. But it sucks. It goes down approximately every thirty-five seconds. You can't do much with that, can you? I didn't think so.

BEGIN COMMERCIAL, SHIELD YOUR EYES IF YOU ARE SENSITIVE!
-I have some cool swag I'm giving away on my review blog and I have a bunch of emails offering me even more cool swag. If you want to win some cool swag, you should look at it. If you want to be a douchebag, you should leave me alone. kthanksbye!
END COMMERCIAL

-New favorite phrases:
"Every one of all y'all are WRONG!"
"Make awkward sexual advances...not war."
"Those police! They can never take a joke."
"No matter what you do, someone is always trying to call the law!"

-I have all these plans and goals and crap and they are REALLY annoying to others. I can't help it. The man can't keep me down! Or, you know, whatever.

-Today was not a total win. But it was close.


Every one of all y'all have a good one!

7 comments:

Anna Leigh said...

:-( I thought one of your new favorite phrases was “she was reaching out…with her CROTCH!“

*smooches*

That Chick Over There said...

With all my heart, I love you.

Twisted Cinderella said...

This post really made me smile.

Anonymous said...

LOL you always have such creative lists lol.

RE: farty dog, what kind of food are you feeding her? Check the ingredients on the list, if there is corn and a lot of grains that would account for the farting. Dogs can't digest corn.

Also some canned pumpkin (100% pumpkin no spices) can also help a bit (also known for eliminating diarrhea and constipation) I know you were just dying to hear all this LOL.

Mrs. Case said...

Those quotes cracked me up. Thanks.

velocibadgergirl said...

OMG, that photo of Ginger is absolute perfection.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Don't forget your tweet about smacking John Edwards with a bag of dicks! My fave. :)