Thursday, August 16, 2007

Different is better. Except if you are ignorant.

So yesterday? When I was at a local store getting twelve tons of candy for the Open House tonight? The cashier said:

“Your little boy looks like he’s one of them Chinamen.”

No. I’m not kidding.

And seriously? Who even SAYS things like that anymore? What the hell?

I cannot imagine how my face looked, but she quickly went on:

“I kept lookin’ and lookin’ at him and I just wasn’t sure, but now I see that his eyes aren’t all slanty.”

I said nothing. What could I say to that? “You’re an ignorant redneck”?

So apparently my face betrayed me because she quickly said, “Not that there’s anything WRONG with that!”

And I finally said, “Um, no. There would be nothing wrong with that.”

She said, “Even though YOU aren’t Chinese.”

I swear to God, I looked around slowly, just in case we had somehow been transported back to 1955 and no one bothered to tell me. I wanted to make sure because I wasn’t wearing my starched dress and kitten heels and I had, you know, driven myself to the store and paid for my purchases with my own money and I didn’t want to get in trouble.

I just looked at her and took my bags. I think I gave her quite the withering glare, but I’m not sure it made any difference.

I got in the car and thought about my friend who adopted a baby from China and how a girl at the pediatrician’s office asked her if her baby was flexible because of those Chinese Acrobats she’d “seen down there in Pigeon Forge”. She thought it was hilarious. I was somewhat horrified.

I thought about the things that I should have said, which include the aforementioned, “You’re an ignorant redneck” and possibly, “Jane you ignorant slut” and “You really need to wax your upper lip” thrown in for good measure.

Then I thought, “Man, I’d like to move to a place where people aren’t quite so backward. That woman just did not turn out.”

Then, I laughed at myself for thinking the phrase, “didn’t turn out”. Because, that’s pretty decidedly country, I think.


That’s so messed up.


frannie said...

my baby is 1/2 chinaman, and I explain it to everyone because I'm proud of it. (and he doesn't look like it)

what a stupid cow.

Angie said...

Now, put yourself in *MY* county. . .or the one next to it (cocke) and add in a child with Down syndrome. You'd be amazed what people ask.

Actually, no. It wouldn't surprise you at all.

Ironically, I bet this clerk eats at the Mandarin House every Sunday afternoon. . . . sigh.

Anonymous said...

People? Are ignorant morons. Seriously. People like that I want to smack around something fierce.

NOT splendid!!

Angie said...

Ahem. . . you ARE talented. Look at this blog!

Anonymous said...

I literally fell off my chair. Because one? Your son does not look like he comes from China in any way. Two? CHINAMAN? Sweetie Pie's 80-year old grandfather used to use that expression and it would make me laugh, because he was an 80-year old redneck who didn't know that terms like that went out of style in the early 60's.

Freaking crazy!

Maybe you just misunderstood her through her thick mustache. Maybe she said that your son looks like a China fan. As in a fan of their Olympic team?

Dreamer said...

omg. so ignorant. geez. what is up with morons now a days? how do they get jobs? ugh.

AnnieM said...

and then Ashton Kutcher jumped out and said,"You've been Punked!" Right? Good God. I almost feel sorry for her and she doesn't know any better, almost.

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

Wow. How sad for her, going through life with such a teeny-weeny brain.

M said...

my head just exploded violently and painfully. that is just too much for me to read. good cod.

Victoria Dehlbom said...

"Even though YOU aren’t Chinese."

How old was this woman? Myabe she hasn't been to Pigeon Forge to check out them there acrobats. You really don't know whether to laugh or cry - it is just one of those things you never expect to hear. It isn't like you would love your son any less if he did have "slanty eyes." Geez!

dennis said...

wow, I almost never hear any backwards comments about my mocha imps (well, except those coming from my own mouth). Sorry you have to put up with that crap.

manders said...

Here's some wisdom from my 19 year old daughter: if you can't end ignorance with education, opt for mandated sterilization of ignorant people.

AND your son doesn't have "slanty" eyes. Maybe if both her eyes pointed in the some direction, she would know that. Jus' sayin'.

Alpha Dude said...

I applaud you for not saying anything. You are a fine example of real CLASS to your children.
They are learning by example.

Blessings to you.

By the way, does he do laundry?

You know I'm only kidding, right?

Right? Hello!


Oh crap.

Edie said...

Whoa!! I can't believe someone would say that!! I can never think fast enough on my feet for immediate come backs, but I tell ya, that deserved one!!

Denise said...

Ok, Chick, you know I like you, but for the love of Ellen you should have said something to that ignorant asshole. Can I say asshole on your blog? OMG BECKY!! Imagine what you sone must have felt! Seriously I dont know how you kept it inside! You need to hang out more with me. Wait, maybe then you might become too outspoken.

Unknown said...

My family is like a rainbow (chinese, iranian, mexican, english, scotish, white-south africa and good old heinz 57 - oh, and an aunt 6 generations back from the South called Jemima, and I wonder why I got kinky hair on the back of my neck when I sweat -uh, when the rest is shiny & straight as a board) and we all have a sense of humour about stuff like this.

Generally, I've found that humour helps ease this kinda situation when slipping a point in;). Nasty never helps. And rarely educates coz walls go up in the face of nasty.

It is messed up. But a lot of things are. She'll probably never forget -- and in future will think twice before verbally vomitting every musing thought that comes to her. Whether she meant it offensively or not.

Anyway, that's my 2 pence of internal head chatter vomit.

Chick, you make me laugh so hard. Thank you.

Unknown said...

I meant to add that I'm so glad I found you blog. You do know (I mean, you read your comments, right?) that I spent two whole days obsessively glued to my computer, reading all of your archives. From beginning to present. But, I promise - I'm not a stalker. Just a connoisseur of good humour and snark.

julie said...

So, was she really that much of an idiot... or was there something OFF with her?!

Amy W said...

Where in the heck do you live??

Unknown said...

Take heart, Chick. It's not just in the South that people act like rednecks. Heck, even here in the Midwest they can be true and total morons. My favorite was when I was at the grocery store, loading the belt with $8,000 worth of groceries for our family. Dude in front of us (who was NOT that old) said, "How many people do you HAVE in your family?" I told him that we had a family of 7... me, hubby, 5 kids. He said... get this...

"Do you even KNOW what it's like to NOT be pregnant?"

I sooooo wish I had had a great one-line comeback to that one. It just ticked me off so much I was silent. I'm hoping that I gave him the withering glare. I'm not sure, though.

Unknown said...


People are filled with stupid - that's all there is to it. Everytime I think I've seen the height of stupidity, I'm proven horribly, horribly wrong.

Be encouraged by the fact that it ain't just the south, though. I've had people up here in the suburbs of the 3rd largest city in the US say some of the brain fartiest crap about my little guy with Down Syndrome. I've had people say they would pray for his "healing" (since it's a disease like cancer or something - not a genetic thing around since, oh, I dunno, CONCEPTION) or ask me if I"m feeding him because he's so much smaller than other kids his age. Because, no. I decided not to feed him. Because it's 1732 and I'm going to starve my evil devil retard Mongoloid baby to death.

There just aren't enough withering stares, scathing comments or boots to the head for people like that.

Urban Daddy said...

My jaw dropped... I just picked it back up.

People never cease to amaze me.

You handled it well and re-told it as if I were actually there. Well done. I'm sure if it were to happen again - heaven forbid - you would handle it differently.

Sabrina said...

I found your blog through Edie's blog. Just wanted to say, I'm half indian half chinese and a couple of years ago, this guy kinda paid me what he thought was a compliment.

He said "You people just look so pretty"

I kept looking backwards looking for "you people". What exactly is you people?

I said "um..ok....thanks" and just moved on.

SJINCO said...

Some people......

I really don't get it.


chick, "that woman just didn't turn out" is NOT a country phrase. Sometimes it is a fact of life. sadly sometimes people just don't turn out.

ps as i was commenting my husband came over and said "WHO'S JASON"...and we live in the city...


an addendum: after I finished my comment I remembered: again, we live in THE CITY and down the street from our house there is a
"Wal-Mart" affectionately (not really) dubbed 'G-Mart' (g-ghetto) because when we first moved here the patrons in front of us were missing teeth and wearing wife beater t-shirts. I was so surprised as I am from Kentucky where this is a pretty common sight and I had moved to Las Vegas and seriously remember thinking "I thought this was THE CITY".

ps the cashier was a CHINA WOMAN with a giant mole on her chin and a 6 inch hair growing out of it. I was freaked out until a year later when I was recounting the story (3 years ago...) and I was informed that in that culture a long chin hair is good luck.

Ry said...

Wow, that is just SO WRONG (of her) on SO MANY levels!!!!

HeatherAnn Fragglehead said...

alissa said...

Whoa... Whoa...


I live in Toronto. Smack in the city centre. We have legalized gay marriages. And, I'm not sure, but I think, so long as it's under an ounce, carrying personal pot is also legal. A few years ago I'd have known for certain.

My in-laws live in Mobile, Alabama. Their city voted against recycling. Oh... and they actually have a "Mobile Association for Retarded Citizens." Seriously. They've even got a website.

Rachel (Crazy-Is) said...

Ok, honestly, when I read that, before I even read "No. I'm not kidding.", I said, outloud (and, yes I am at work, in an office, a professional one) "are you fucking kidding me?!?!?!".