Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Deep Thoughts with Boy and Girl Child.

The Boy and the Girl Child have a lot of conversations. I admire and appreciate how they thoughtfully discuss nearly everything and I try really hard to stay out of what they talk about, unless one of them is saying something just really, really wrong. For example, when the Girl tried to tell the Boy that they used machine guns in the Spanish/American War, and I'm sorry, even I who is so not the history buff knew that was incorrect. No matter what the Cartoon Network depicts.

Lately? They have been engaging in very philosophical discussions about:
1) Jesus
2) Jesus' dad, God
3) Was God Jesus' biological father? Or was Joseph?
4) Heaven
5) Whether or not Jesus has a dog

(The consensus on #5? Yes. He must. Because dogs make people happy and Jesus? He's pretty darn happy. He's always smiling in those pictures)

On Sunday I heard them in the Girl's bedroom, talking in excited voices. I peeked my head in and they were reading Old Turtle. I know there is some "discussion" about this book, but I like it. I think it's a really beautiful way to explain God to children. Because, in my humble opinion, it's not that easy to explain.

They were also discussing Jesus. Particularly, (and I probably shouldn't admit this because I'll get a bunch of email from people about how awful I am and what a horrible person I am and how my children are being raised by heathens and we're all going to hell and whatnot), if Jesus farts or not.

The Girl felt he probably does.
The Boy felt that, no, he probably does not. Because Jesus is perfect and being perfect means you wouldn't fart.

"But everyone farts!" The Girl was explaining in her typical, exasperated way. "Even Daddy!"

(Daddy is not a good example by the way. I'll just leave it at that)

"Not everyone! Not Jesus!" Boy Child argued.


"He heals the sick Girl Child, he can squeeze his cheeks for a minute!"

Why we have so many farting conversations in my home, I will never know.

When I was a child I used to think about what I would ask God when I got to Heaven. All these things I never understood and what they would all mean. All my questions, answered.

I thought about it a lot as a kid.

I really hope they don't think about that.


Angie said...

I'm just saying. . . all those legumes and other middle-easternish foods?

Yeah. . .He probably did.

But, they didn't smell. Duh. He's God.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Jesus farted. 'Sho 'nuff. But nobody got pissed about him farting because he was the Son of God. He could puke in the wedding wine and nobody would get angry.

Anonymous said...

we are made in god's image, thus god farts. if you want to explain the nature of a fart being about gas and all that stuff, that might help, too.

Mark Aubrey said...

I've got to go with Girl Child in the preamble discussion about there being machine guns in the Spanish/American War.

I found it on the internet. Here. And here, if you trust wikipedia.

Now I need to corroborate the fact that "...seven out (of) ten women in 19th-century America lost their right arms to dynamite explosions.

Angie said...

See why I love him so much???

CPA Mom said...

I had never heard of Old Turtle and I have now ordered it. Looks like a great book!

I wish I could be a fly on the wall of your house. Your kids rock.

Anonymous said...

I think if you have a kid over the age of 3 or 4 in your house, farting is pretty much the number one topic of conversation. Like you, I'm not sure why that is. But it is.

SJINCO said...

We talk about farts a lot in my house too - it's a boy thing I'm sure....

Your kids are awesome. So far beyond their age with all this philosophical stuff and whatnot.

the planet of janet said...

i love your children.

but please issue a warning before you post something this hilarious. my husband gets cranky when i wake him up with raucous laughter before a certain hour of the morning.

Tricia said...

Really? My kids NEVER would talk about farting. No way. Now, poop. That is, apparently, worthy of discussion. Often. At dinner. In resturants.

Also? I am going to guess that Jesus farts. Hopefully he was just polite enough to throw out an "excuse me" every now and again afterwards.

Bethany said...

Ebaby & I has a conversation about Jesus just today.

Ebaby, "Everybody sins." (I have no idea where this came from.)
Me, "Who never sinned at all?"
Ebaby, "Jesus!"
Me, "That's right."
Ebaby, "Wow, his family must have loved him for being so good. And there probably wasn't a lot of yelling at His house."