Divorce is on my mind.
Before you ask, Jason and I are fine. In fact he gleefully informed me just this past weekend that I was "the best wife ever". I really think I need a crown or something. Or maybe just something sparkly...like diamonds. Just a small token to signify my status.
It's okay, though. We've never been that kind of people.
We get along really well, for the most part, but God knows we have our moments. And I try to avoid stabbing him in the throat when those moments come about. I'm sure he feels the same about me.
Someone dear to me is contemplating divorce.
Divorce is sad to me.
I want to help and I don't know how. Right now I just want to listen and be a good friend. I want to be a good friend. I feel like I lost a lot of friends when I went through a divorce. A lot of people started wondering what, exactly, I had done wrong and why that jackass stopped loving me. They gave "constructive" advice about how I should be better, do better, look better. If I would just do that, then he'd come back to me.
I am better. A lot better, now. Thank you.
He never came back. Thank you again.
I didn't know at the time, but my first husband leaving me was the best thing that ever happened to me. At the time? I felt like I was going to die. Literally die. I was miserable and shamed and scorned and I thought my life was over.
But it wasn't.
And him leaving me opened the door for all kinds of things. College and my own house and, oh yeah, that small thing about meeting the guy I was actually supposed to be with.
So I should really thank him, I suppose.
I won't, though, because he was a dickface. He could have been kind and loving and delicate. He was mean and cruel and harsh. There are ways to get a divorce that don't destroy one's very soul and he? Was not concerned about those ways.
It doesn't have to be that way. I think the person dear to me gets it. I know she does.
I try to not to think much about divorce, but it's on my mind.
I just want to reassure anyone who's there...it gets better. No matter what side of the table you are on. It gets better.