Thursday, December 07, 2006

Franklin Covey, I'm your bitch

I'm a planner.

Some might say, I'm a teensy bit obsessive about it. (Others might say that I'm a psychotic freak about it, but they need to just shut up.)

For the past ten years or so, I've went from one project to another. Some of the projects are ongoing. For example, those twins I popped out almost nine years ago. That one is going to last a little longer. Others, have an end in sight. The major one, of course, being school. I am graduating in nine days. NINE DAYS!!!! Ahem. Anyway, obviously this has been a huge part of my life for the past four years and I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do with myself once I don't have all this homework and assorted other crap that I have to do.

I mentioned graduate school to Jason and he turned a very unattractive shade of green and told me I wasn't allowed to even think about that for at least a year. Normally he doesn't tell me what to do but I think he has a pretty good point this time so I'll listen. It might be nice and charitable of me to give him the wife experience that doesn't include me weeping and/or gnashing my teeth most of the time. I'm generous like that.

Here are some other ideas I've been kicking around.

1) Auditioning for the NBC gameshow Deal or No Deal.

I said to Jason, "It seems like they only pick really loud, insane crazy people to be on that show."
He said, "You're totally in!"

Coming from someone as generally appropriate as him? That is darn funny.

2) Some kind of excessive cardio.

I totally love going to the gym. I really do.

Okay, that was a huge lie. I hate it. I hate it more than I hate eggs and that's a lot. But I used go quite regularly and I really liked how it made me look and feel. I've given myself a two month break so I could get through all the Senior crap that I had to do. I also gave myself permission to not feel bad about it, so I haven't. It's been awesome.

But seriously, that's one of those things that I'm getting back into. For sure. Promise.

3) Finishing my novel.

I like to write books and then not show them to anyone. My most recent book was, "Why men who carry tote bags scare me." Pulitzer Prize, here I come!

I also wrote a book in 2004 called, "100 Reasons I suck as a mom." Jason read it and said, very cautiously, "This IS supposed to be funny, right?" Thanks for not calling Child Protective Service hon!

4) Take up soap opera writing.

I could totally do it. Seriously. I've had so much drama in the last ten years, I could just write about my life. There would have to be more sex though. I'm less of a whore-bag than the average soap opera star.

5) Work on my forgiveness skills.

I probably need to do this one anyway. I can hold a grudge like nobody's business. One person in particular in my life (not really IN my life...I haven't seen her in a couple of years) really needs my forgiveness. Or to burn in hell. Or whatever.

So...what do you think? Any of these ideas float your boat? Do you have any other suggestions for what to do with these gobs of free time I'm going to have? Do tell!


Bethany said...

I'd love to read "100 Reasons I suck as a Mom". You and I could collaborate then we'd have 200 reasons!
I read your archives last night. I immediately added you to my Bloglines- great stuff

velocibadgergirl said...

I think packing you and your kids and your cute friend with the tall husband up for a road trip to Indiana sounds like a GREAT IDEA. ;)

M said...

I vote 1, 3, 4 and brush up on your obsessively stalk Michelle skills. Bonus points if you bring your little family with you and hide in my storage space!!! WEEEEEE!

You. are. graduating.

p.s. fuck forgiveness. the end.

CPA Mom said...

OOOHHH, #5, I need help with too. Except she, my sister, needs to burn in hell. Oh, did I say that out loud? Oops.

That Chick Over There said...

Sadly, I have about 10000 reasons I suck as a mom. But I thought that would make the book to heavy.