Saturday, March 08, 2008

The Ultimate Blog Party 2008

Everyone come party!

Okay, not everyone. Boys can't come.

Is that sexist? I hope not. Maybe the boys can have an Ultimate Boy party and make everything blue and about earning more money than women for the same amount of work and trucks and crushing things. How about that?

I'm supposed to introduce myself now, in case you don't know me already. Or, in case I guess, you haven't figured out that I'm sort of a Snarky McSnarkster.

I'm That Chick. I'm 32. I've got an unemployed husband, a really craptacular job, twins who will be ten years old in a few weeks and a dog who likes to burp in my face. Also, I'm fat, my toes are extremely ugly and live with secondary infertility.

I'm the total package. Clearly.

I write here every day. Every. Day. I haven't missed a day since sometime in December of last year and that was only because I went to Biltmore and it's all old and romantic and glamorous and crap and they didn't have high speed internet in the rooms and even if they did, I was being cultured. And whatnot.

I also write at Scrivel, with some other funny people. I would be ever so happy if you would read my stories there and, if you are so inclined, vote on them. I don't get money or fame or anything if you do, but I'm really sad and extremely pathetic and it makes me happy to see the stars next to my stories light up.

I want to write for a living but I keep getting rejected, so apparently I suck.

That's about it.

Oh unless you want to give me a job writing (that's not porn) or give my husband a job (also, not porn). Then email me. We'll hang.

70 comments:

Rebecca said...

haha... you made me laugh :-)

just stoppin' by for the party!

SJINCO said...

*waves*

Misty said...

this was the best introduction ever. Here's to being 32, dealing with infertility of any kind and publication rejection letters. we can suck together!

Delightfully Chaotic said...

Hi and thanks for stopping by my blog--nice intro.

dawn klinge said...

I enjoyed reading your blog. I love your sense of humor. It's nice to meet you.

Angie said...

Thanks for popping by at the butt crack of dawn this morning. I'm sorry you couldn't sleep. (Gee, can't imagine why you can't sleep. . .)

Keep a good thought.

Jessica said...

I love your about me section. We're planning on sending our kids to a secret ninja school in CO when the time comes.

Spider Lady said...

Now you funny. Great way to wake up in the morning....you going on my feed! BTW, thanks for visiting!

Rain-girl said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog! Your party post wass very fun to read!

Megan/Brassy Apple said...

Popping in to say hello!

thanks for stopping by my party as well!

Anonymous said...

It's great to meet you!! I just wanted to say thanks for making me laugh today! I really needed that!

Tarasview said...

I already read your blog every day... but Happy blog party anyway! And I think you are an excellent writer. And hilarious.
Did hubby hear back about his job interview yet?

Haley said...

You are hilarious!!! :-) Thanks for stopping by my blog! I really worked hard picking out the design, I'm glad you liked it!

I'll be back for your witty banter for sure!

Karen Erickson said...

Ah well I'm a writer and what I write you might think is porn! LOL It's just really hot romance. Like super hot. Graphic language hot - but there's plot. And romance. No bad acting or cheesy background music. Hee hee.

So glad to meet you, I like your blog, I think you're hilarious!

http://karenerickson.blogspot.com

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

Good intro Chick. Heh...I'm so bleary eyed this morning I typoed that and typed Chuck. Yeah, that would've helped with the whole crap self-esteem thing, right?

Anonymous said...

Party on, Wayne.

I don't comment often, but I want you to know I stalk you everyday.

Just though you should know.

jayedee said...

nicetameetcha! i'm jayedee, mom of 12, living in the sunshine state! party on dudette! lol. if you love chickens (and what woman doesn't love chickens?) check out the awesome giveaway on my blog this week!

So Many Scraps said...

I love your blog name!!! I have said that phrase enough in my lifetime! my youngest son is Jason and he is the one who has tested me the most in life! THANK YOU LOREAL or I would be totally grey! And then he has a son and names the kid after him so there is a Jason jr. and then him and mom split and I end up with jr. alot and so now I have to say it still to my son and sometimes to grandson! BUT fortunately I think grandson has way more smarts then dad does (or at least then dad USES!) LOVE your blog! great postings! I hope to come back and read your writings so since I enjoyed it so much I am adding you to my blog feed!

Diane Viere said...

LOL!

Welcome to the blog party!

I laughed my way through your post...are you sure you aren't published.....Don't take offense...but I think the world NEEDS another Erma Bombeck style writer.

Did you ever read anything by her? She always made me smile!

Nice to meet you.

Diane

Lisa Lou Hoo said...

Hi,
Thanks for stopping by! You are hilarious and I will definately be back for a few more laughs. It's nice to meet someone else with a sense of humor!
Happy partying!
Lisa

Anonymous said...

cool intro :D I have dutifully bookmarked scrivel so I can go vote for your little stars sometime soon.
Happy Blog Party :)

Anonymous said...

WooHOO! Let's party, Chick! You should come by and rock out on my blog with Rihanna! :) I have Margaritas!

Amy from Occupation: Mommy said...

Thanks for leaving a comment on my blog! I will be reading more of your blog, definitely.

Marie said...

OK, who's Jason?

My friend tried to get pregnant for seven years. They have finally adopted, and she is BEAUTIFUL!! Adoption may have been more stressful than pregnancy, and I was just watching it from another state!!

Mrs.Naz@BecomingMe said...

Can I just say that you are a riot? I loved your post. Thanks for throwing a fun party. Angela

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

Snort! The feeling is mutual. Don't be alarmed if I skulk around your blog a lot tonight, you make me LOL and I like to LOL.
Good luck with the j.o.b.!

Chanin said...

Hello! Nice to meet you! Love your blog, I will definitely be back to visit!

DeeBee said...

It's nice to meet you. I look forward to reading your blog. Have fun this week at the party.

GranthamLynn said...

Hi,
Thanks for coming over and visiting me during the party. I post everyday too. So come on over and we'll hang.
Blessings, Sherry

Adrienne said...

Thanks for the party. It was nice to meet you. Thanks for stopping by.

Trish said...

Thanks for coming to my party - I enjoyed your post and look forward to checking out your writing. Have a good one!

CC said...

Hey I'm 32 too (did I just admit that??). And deal with infertility. Primary, secondary, tertiary, whatever. No babies. Luckily I was blessed with the best kids ever! Oh, my husband is unemployed too. Although its by choice (here's to another 8 years of studenthood! woo hoo!). I jest. I actually am one happy girl--except that I think I already admitted my age and it isn't very "girl-like" any more :(

Anonymous said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog! Yours is HILARIOUS! It's nice to meet ya!

Misty said...

thanks for stopping by my place. Yes, although not a stickler for rules, I am anal so when someone presents a good list challenge, you know I will keep it up!

Hillary (Mrs. Einstein) said...

Nice to meet you! Thanks for stopping by. My toes are ugly, too. Short and squat.

A Big Ball of Stress said...

Hey Chick! Nice to meet ya! Thanks for popping by my blog during the party! Thanks for the "You Go Girl"...it made me smile :) Party on dude!

Anonymous said...

What a kick-a$$ intro that is! Dear Chick, you totally rock. Thanks for the invite to the party, and hope you've a great time at the UBP! :D

Anonymous said...

This blog is being reported to Five Minutes for Mom for inappropriate content. You are disgusting, your blog is disgusting, and someone should take your children away from you. You have no business promoting your blog with other good Christian women.

Actorgirl said...

Chick, you ROCK!!!!!

SMOOCHES!
Thanks for the invite to the party!

Jenski said...

PAR-TAY! You know, you could write a HILARIOUS Q&A column. I don't know if that is something you would WANT to do, but it would be FUNNY. Thanks for writing every day. I love reading.

Sorry for all the caps. But it is a PAR-TAY and I got excited.

Anonymous said...

Stopped by for the party - funny blog!

Kellie said...

It's so refreshing to meet another person w/ugly toes. I loathe flip flops because I can't wear them.

:) Thanks for stopping by my blog...I'll be checking back in on you Mrs. Snarky Snark Snarkster.

Julie Donahue said...

Thanks for visiting my party. It definitely got my morning off to a smiling start. I looked ahead (or I guess it was behind) to your post about deserving children. I can so relate. Even after we adopted our first (after 7 years of infertility) we still waited another 5 years for a successful pregnancy. I didn't have trouble with most pregnancies, but the moms that didn't care----oh those were tough.

lara said...

Thanks for stopping by , i too have fat toes and twins!!

2nd Cup of Coffee said...

Thanks for stopping by 2nd Cup. I enjoyed finding your spot here and sort of snooping around, although we were invited snoopers. I relate to your writing woes. And now I need to check out Scrivel. And I believe you are the commenter who said you don't watch LOST. This must change. Get season one from the library. I have never been into another show like this in my life. And that's why I have become a LOST evangelist.

Kimmie said...

Aaaaahahahahahaha! You are funny! Thanks for coming by my party! I'm going to be checking back with you DAILY! :)

Gina said...

Love your blog header. Party on.

Mrs. Nichole J. said...

Thanks for stopping by!
Was great and hope you come again.
Nichole
http://blog.handmadebycole.com/

Teri said...

Thanks for the entertaining introduction. I, too, suffer from infertility, so I know how much it hurts. I pray that things work out for you soon! Visit my blog for my ups and downs on this infertile journey.

Jenn said...

You are TOO funny. Thanks for stopping in at my blog. I got a kick out of reading your blog. You have a great layout... did you design it yourself? Keep up the great work. And... did you enjoy the Biltmore? We visited last year with kids and didn't actually go "in",just to the visitor's center. Some time I'd like to go back kid free and enjoy ourselves.

Geggie said...

Ok, you are funny! Thanks for coming to visit my blog party. I'll be back.

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you've made it to the part - thanks for having me over - I love stopping by your blog. Your writing always makes me smile. Have a great week!

Jessica said...

Thanks for stopping by my site! You are too funny! I think I'll be back to visit soon!

Troy and Heather Cady said...

Hey, thanks for stopping by our blog. It was great to "meet" you :) Hope you are enjoying the party!

♥.Trish.♥ Drumboys said...

Beautiful and funny introduction.
I ♥ your party post.
Just dropping by to say hello too.
I have twin boys 20 months old.

thanks for visiting me
My Little Drummer boys

Anonymous said...

Okay, you so totally don't suck. The people who are not hiring you? They suck. Yup. It's true. Look it up... It says so right there. I will be back to read more... Because you're funny and I like that.

Great to meet you! Happy blog partying.

Anonymous said...

hey! i like you're writing, but unfortuantely I 'm not hiring! lol.. of course I'd need a real job... sorry! lol.
Hope you're enjoying the UBP anyhow!!!

Amy W said...

I wish I was hiring!

Pfingston said...

Hi! I'm just bopping around the party. I don't write very well, but I try to keep it light and real, if those two CAN go together. I certainly couldn't write every day, wish I could. I can't. Aside from not having the time, my husband is extreamly suspisious of all computer activity and is certain that you all are just plotting against us and hence cringes when he sees me on the computer. Well, party on!

Anonymous said...

I saw your blog's name on the Blog Party list and realized just how long it has been since I stopped by your blog! I'm sorry Chick, I didn't mean to disappear like that :) How the heck are ya? lol

Real Life Sarah said...

ROFL!!!!

Alexis Jacobs said...

You crack me up!! Where do you live that you went to the Biltmore? Are you a fellow North Carolinian?

Thanks for stopping by my party!

Anonymous said...

Ok! Nice to meet you! That was an interesting post.

HOpe you can drop by my blog. I review books.

Barb said...

haha... loved your blog...great humor...I will definately be checking in again...
feel free to come over and check out my party and the adventures of spotlis

Brittany said...

Thanks for visiting my party! It was nice to meet you! :)

(I have a giveaway going on, if you're interested!)

Sorry to hear about Hubby not getting the job. We've been there, and it's rough! Good luck! :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog party. I actually think you are a very funny writer so what do those "professionals" know anyway.

Tami said...

You are hilarious. Thanks for stopping by Muddlin' Thru Motherhood. We live about an hour from Biltmore. WE used to have season passes but we let them expire when we started having so many kids we can't be seen in public. Especially at a place like Biltmore. Do you live close by? Stop back by my blog anytime. I'd love to chat with you sometime.

Laura said...

Funny! I like the cultured crap part... :)

Happy blog party!

Superdumb Supervillain said...

thanks for stopping by my blog party! Please visit again, I'll be posting a bunch of new contests in the next week or two...

Unknown said...

Still hopping from blog to blog... my goal is to post at each blog at least once. Nice to meet you. Happy blogging!